By: Patrick Maguire
Book Chapter: Customer Hall of Fame
Today’s post comes courtesy of Darren Tully, a loyal reader and commentor on this blog. Darren works at a take-away food counter in Dublin, Ireland. He sent me the following email over the weekend that I am sharing with his permission. This is priceless.
I love customers who you can have a laugh with. One of my regulars, I’ll call her “Mel”, is like that. Mel is 80 years old, and despite needing a zimmer frame, she insists on waiting like everyone else to place her order. She is unbelievably funny and always has a kind word to say, even if she has a complaint to make. I admit that I’m very fond of her. She always asks to speak to me whenever she’s in, and I consider her to be like one of my great aunties.
I was on closing shift tonight so there were only two of us, myself on counter and my friend on tables and dish room. Out of nowhere we got a mini rush in the last 15 minutes. As lines go, it was no big deal. There was no huge wait for the customers, but I had one incredibly impatient woman in the line, a nominee for your Customer Hall of Shame.
When I finally got to serve her I greeted her with a big smile, but before I could say anything she snarled, “Tea to go, NOW!” And that was it–she didn’t speak to me again, she only glared for the rest of transaction. I don’t really understand why she acted that way, I was serving everyone ahead of her in a speedy and friendly manner, but I guess there is no pleasing some people.
Mel was in the line behind her and watched the whole thing. As the woman was walking away, Mel shuffled up and said, “Not enough dick, that’s what her problem is.”, loud enough for everyone, including the woman, to overhear. It was so funny. The other customers were either giggling or standing slack-jawed, and the woman was shaking with indignant rage as she left.
I thought I was going to explode from holding the laughter in, I honestly don’t know how I wasn’t rolling around on the floor behind the counter.
I absolutley love customers like “Mel”. Here’s to Darren Tulley and all of the Mel’s of the world who speak up and say what every worker would love to, but can’t. Mel is a shoo-in for my Customer Hall of Fame.
Please share your stories about customers who have come to your defense and called out other asshole customers. Thank you.