“Do You Know Who I Am?”

By: Patrick Maguire

Book Chapter: Personal Pet Peeves

Posted: 11/22/2010

Most veteran customer service industry workers have encountered some form of the obnoxious question, Do you know who I am? from customers seeking preferential treatment. I have, and I included the following suggestion on my list of 64 Suggestions for Restaurant Customers:

#13- Never attempt the old; Do you know who I am? Anyone who is ignorant enough to try any variation on that question should have a trap door open under them and they should never be seen or heard from again.

Today’s post is reprinted with permission from Adam Gaffin, founder of Boston’s Universal Hub:

Ritziest arrests of the week as police bust up hotel party despite dire warnings about the consequences 

By adamg – 11/20/10 – 8:34 pm

Boston Police report busting up a grand old time at the Ritz-Carlton early this morning and arresting four young gentlemen on a variety of charges. Officers declined the party-giver’s request to leave, now, and grimly carried on despite one party-goer’s warning they would face the wrath of his connections, police say.

Police say officers responded to the downtown hotel around 3 a.m., on the request of hotel security, who said they were unable to quell the party:

While making their way towards the room, officers observed several individuals in possession of alcoholic beverages exiting the location. Once in front of the room, officers looked inside and observed approximately 25 – 30 people making noise and consuming alcohol inside the room. Upon entering the location, officers asked to speak to the legal tenants. When nobody took responsibility for the party, officers began turning the lights on and off while, at the same time, instructing everyone to leave the location. For a short time, most of the party-goers flat out ignored the officers and the legal instructions that had been given. Finally, one of the party-goers, stating that he was the legal tenant, approached the officers and told them that they were no longer welcome inside his place and that they – they being the officers – needed to leave.

Sultan Alhokair, 22, of Boston, was put under arrest and charged with being the keeper of a disorderly house and resisting arrest. (Name redacted upon request), 22, of New York, was then cuffed and charged with resisting arrest and witness intimidation when he tried to block Alhokair’s arrest, police say, adding (“Redacted”) warned:

You have no idea who you are messing with. You are going to be in big trouble. I have friends who will take care of you.

Abdul Alathim, 21, was also arrested on a charge of resisting arrest.

The night did not end with those arrests, police say:

As officers were transporting the suspects to Area A-1 (Downtown) for booking, officers observed and noted that a car, filled with people from the party, was following closely behind the prisoner transport wagon. Upon arriving at the station, officers approached the vehicle and asked the operator for his license. When the suspect stated that he didn’t have one, officers took the operator into custody.

Abdullah Saud, 23, of Cambridge, was charged with operating without a license.

Admin note: Stay tuned. According to Adam Gaffin, the arraignment is scheduled for tomorrow, 11/23.


13 Responses to ““Do You Know Who I Am?””

  1. Drew says:

    Y’know what I’d love? If that statement, “You have no idea who you are messing with. You are going to be in big trouble. I have friends who will take care of you.” got treated as a threat, not just some rich brat who needs an assbeating running his mouth, and prosecuted accordingly.

  2. Mike R says:

    That’s one of my favorites. “Do you know who I am?” I’m sorry sir but if you don’t know who you are, I will be unable to serve you alcohol.

  3. I might have told you this one before, but it’s worth repeating if I have. I was working in Palm Beach, FL at a supper club/hotel as Maitre’d night mgr. A customer came in on a Sat. night at 7:30PM and demanded to be seated. I had no tables. And he said, Do you know who I am? I said no. He then said, Do you know what kind of car I just left with your valet? I again said no. He wasn’t through yet. He then said, Do you know how much money I am worth? I again said “No, but unless you have some wood, nails and a hammer you are not getting seated tonight.”
    Love,
    Richard

  4. Ian Thal says:

    I have lost count of how many times I have heard that from petulant middle-school students.

    My response:

    “Have you seen a single movie where that line worked?”

  5. Steve says:

    A few years ago I was working in a very busy NYC mid-town restaurant. My good friend was a manager and happened to be at the front desk during the pre-theatre rush when a couple approached him. The man asked for a table for two. When my friend told him it would be a forty-five minute wait, the man let him know that the “young” lady (of about 50 years) with him was Twiggy. My friend looked down at the wait list and without looking up said, “Well, for Twiggy! Then it will be…a forty-five minute wait.”
    Undaunted, the man insisted they be seated, as they were expected backstage before a particular show to chat with the star. My friend looked the man straight in the eye and said, “Are you asking me to make an acception to our policy for who Twiggy is, or for who she used to be?”
    They ate at the bar.

  6. Big Paulie says:

    Joe Welch, one of the late Steven Rubell’s assistants at the door of Studio 54 in New York during the late ’70s, had the perfect schtick for these morons. He had a telephone extension on a podium near the door, and when faced with the “do you know who I am” question, would immediately press the hands-free intercom button, which would send his voice to every other phone in the place and a loudspeaker right nearby, audible to all others waiting to get past the velvet ropes and “get in.” Joe would announce something like, “Excuse me, but there’s a guy at the door who doesn’t know who he is. If you know who he is, would you please let him know so perhaps he can find his way home…” etc.

    Invariably, the offender would slink off into the night, tail between his legs.

    Back then, the places where folks would go after Studio closed for the night were all run by guys who’d beat-up anyone who had the nerve to be so insolent. The son of a very powerful politician got a shiner and a couple of broken ribs from some of these guys, for being a wise-ass. The politician tried his best to close the place down, and he discovered that he was out of his league.

    As to the trash mentioned in the story above, it’s astounding how these children are somehow instilled with the incredible feeling of entitlement. It’s usually boorish, entitled parents who’re nouveaux riches.

    It’s been my experience in dealing with the incredibly wealthy and extremely famous that if they want to carry on in the fashion that the Copley Plaza kids were carrying on, they won’t do it in a public hotel nor an apartment house where they’ll bring attention to themselves. Actually, but for a few who’re plagued by demons, they don’t get into situations where people might not know who they are and where that knowledge would actually make a difference.

    There is a restaurant near us that’s one of the nicest places in our small New England state. Those of us who eat there regularly are treated delightfully by the staff, because even though we’re “regulars,” we know the ropes; we must make reservations in advance, dress appropriately and conduct ourselves in a respectful manner. Of course, there’re legions of people who eat there once or twice a year, and for some reason feel that since they’ve been there before, they can abuse the staff and annoy the other diners.

    One evening when we arrived there was a huge crowd at the bar and a glut of people around the maitre d’ stand. The hostess saw us and beckoned us over — she seemed relieved. Our party of six was seated immediately in an otherwise full restaurant. Shortly after we were seated, we saw her point at us and whisper something to one of the others in a party that was waiting. Later she came over and told us that an imbecile and his hangers-on had popped the “do you know…” question (they’d walked-in wearing jeans, tees and had made no reservation). She told us that when we were seated, he asked her “how come they got that table, that’s where I thought you were gonna seat ME?!” She replied without skipping a beat, “oh, don’t you know who they are?” and walked away. Imbecile and his party beat a hasty retreat.

  7. Dava says:

    I look forward to the follow-up, including the parent’s comments and reactions; for I’m sure that even though they are “adults,” the parents are going to be responding.

  8. Micheal Mason says:

    I witnessed the best reponse from a bistro manager whilst working in Brighton, England last year. In the Bistro at a well known french style hotel My Restaurant manager was approached by a group of men in suits. This was during the Labour party political confrence, and the bistro was fully booked.

    “Excuse me, we need a table for 6 asap”.

    “i’m sorry sir, we are fully booked this evening. If you would like to enquire at reception they may be able to book you a table elsewhere”.

    “I dont think you understand. We are conference delegates, with a VIP and need a table, ASAP.”

    “I understand Sir, But we are fully booked, and fully seated. there is nothing I can do.”

    “Do you have any idea who you are talking to? That gentleman is the secretary of defence of the United Kingdom, and dining elsewhere would compromise security”.

    “I’m sorry. I am Hungarian and from a small town, so I dont have a clue who he, or you, are. If it is so important you eat here i would recomend booking next time. So if you could please move away from the entrance I have guests to attend to.”

    “you are so fired”

    “I’m sure. as I said Sir, Reception would be the best place to start, Good eveining”.

    Priceless.

  9. steve t says:

    A reply for “Do you know who I am?”:

    Scientists are getting closer to finding the center of the universe. You’ll probably be surprised to find out it isn’t you.

  10. Jim says:

    I once had occasion to ask a former NFL QB Who he was, He told me his name in “that” way famous people will. So I told him I knew who he was, I was just checking to see if he knew who he was. He had suffered numerous concussions during his career. He laughed.

  11. All the responses were terrrrrrific! Really enjoyed this post. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard it… sooooo many. I especially liked richard obrien’s comment. Good one!

  12. Sean S. says:

    As to the trash mentioned in the story above, it’s astounding how these children are somehow instilled with the incredible feeling of entitlement. It’s usually boorish, entitled parents who’re nouveaux riches.

    While I’ve enjoyed reading this blog, this comment illustrates to me a common thread amongst many commenter’s here; namely classist responses implying that those who are rude are such because of a either a lack of wealth, or as in the case of this comment, the lack of the right kind of wealth.

    The truth is of course is that disrespect and rudeness are not intrinsic to either one’s class origins or one’s current financial status. Cheapskates and those who attempt to abuse or use service staff don’t do so necessarily because they lack money or are ignorant of the social etiquette of fine dining; many of these same people are the one’s you see in line ANYWHERE abusing staff, be it a person working at a fast food joint, to public employee’s, to simply anyone who gets in their way.

  13. Nona Mills says:

    A few years ago I was working in a very busy NYC mid-town restaurant. My good friend was a manager and happened to be at the front desk during the pre-theatre rush when a couple approached him. The man asked for a table for two. When my friend told him it would be a forty-five minute wait, the man let him know that the “young” lady (of about 50 years) with him was Twiggy. My friend looked down at the wait list and without looking up said, “Well, for Twiggy! Then it will be…a forty-five minute wait.” Undaunted, the man insisted they be seated, as they were expected backstage before a particular show to chat with the star. My friend looked the man straight in the eye and said, “Are you asking me to make an acception to our policy for who Twiggy is, or for who she used to be?” They ate at the bar.

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